the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
only if we run a train.
done.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
