Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
