We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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