I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I smell stomach acid.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
