Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Randomize
