Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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