It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize
