both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
