Im at strip club and am horny
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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