Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Randomize
