Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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