the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
This baby is an asshole
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Randomize
