hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
