Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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