She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
sex in a hospital.. check
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize