i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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