Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
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