Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Are my feet made of real feet?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
