She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Randomize
