those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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