I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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