I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
