ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Randomize
