he wants to bone in the snuggie
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
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