Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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