She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
You are the jesus of drinking
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Randomize
