READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Randomize
