is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Randomize
