It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
