I didn't shave. On purpose
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize