She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Randomize
