i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
