i jhust puked up my retainher.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
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