I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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