i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
