...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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