Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
