Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Randomize
