How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
