her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize