Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
