whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Randomize
