i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
