I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
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