another moral hangover. fuck.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
