We're facebook friends in real life
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
