She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
