There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize