C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
We have so much sex to catch up on
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
