i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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