Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
